Sunday, October 16, 2011

Listen up all you literary snobs out there...

Here is where I confess something. This is something I have been rather bashful about in the past. Something the "smart reader" in me would never want to admit. Something no one who reads a lot would probably admit. Something that someone who wants you to know they are "a reader" wouldn't admit. I just decided I don't care...I'm coming out there...I'm gonna say it...are you ready?





I LIKE STEPHEN KING BOOKS





It seems silly right that I would be wary to admit that? I think a lot of people who would be considered "readers" would say that they are not big Stephen King fans. I would say that almost all of those same people would be people that have only seen made for TV movies based on Stephen King books. That most of these people have never read a Stephen King book. I would wager to bet that a lot of these people also would rave about movies like "The Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile, Hearts in Atlantis, Stand By Me" and don't realize they are based on Stephen King books. He doesn't just write horror and science fiction...although he does do that really well.



The other day we were at the thrift store thumbing through children's books for Olivia (*sidenote I only buy childrens books these days from the thrift store, they have so many and they are usually in good shape and they are sooooooo cheap!). Anyways I don't really ever check out the other books because they tend to be a bunch of crap. But I saw a big hardbound Stephen King book, Nightmares and Dreamscapes. Huh for $2.00 I'll buy it. It's Halloween time and since my love of horror movies tended to be thrown out the window because Mitchell hates them and it's no fun to watch them alone, I can still read horror, right? I open up the book and start reading the prologue. And once again I am hit by how clever and funny Stephen King really is, how much he seems so relatable. This is what the first page of the prologue says;



"When I was a kid I believed everything I was told, everything I read and every dispatch sent out by my own overheated imagination. This made for more than a few sleepless nights, but it also filled the world I lived in with colors and textures I would not have traded for a lifetime of restful nights. I knew even then, you see, that there were people in the world-too many of them, actually-whose imaginative senses were either numb or completely deadened, and who lived in a mental state akin to colorblindness. I always felt sorry for them, never dreaming (at least then) that many of these unimaginative types either pitied me or held me in contempt, not just because I suffered from any number of irrational fears but because I was deeply and unreservedly credulous on almost every subject. "There's a boy," some of them must have thought (I know my mother did), "who will buy the Brooklyn Bridge not just once but over and over again all his life." There was some truth to that then, I suppose, and if I am to be honest, I suppose there's some truth to it now. My wife still delights in telling people that her husband cast his first presidential ballot, at the tender age of 21, for Richard Nixon. "Nixon said he had a plan to get us out of Vietnam," she says, usually with a gleeful gleam in her eye, "and Steve believed him!". That's right; Steve believed him. Nor is that all Steve has believed during the often -eccentric course of his forty-five years."




He writes scary stories because he is like a big kid and I like that! Sure he shows up now and then in his miniseries movies and he looks like a total whackjob...like who would be suprised this guy write horror so well, look at him! But he is really such a good writer and he can make fun of himself. Now I am not saying all his books are good because I have not read them all and I have also read some real crap (Bag of Bones was terrible!!!!). But there is a reason he is so terribly successful and there is a reason they are always making his books into movies or miniseries...even though the miniseries that follow the book almost exactly tend to not be very good and ooze cheese. You will never be able to be frightened as much by images in a movie as you can be by words on the page. Your imagination and interpretation of what's happening in your minds eye as you read along will win hands down every time! Case in point... Stanley Kubrick's "The Shining", was basically the same idea as the book and it says that it's based on the book in the opening credits. While the idea is the same, Kubrick changed things, added things, took out things and the movie was really good and really scary. Stephen King, bless his heart, made his own movie out of "The Shining" and it was...well...cheesy and not that great and much too long. Or did you see Dreamcatchers? The Mist? Those movies were not great...but the books, I read them both...were very scary.



Anyways I was first introduced to Stephen King as a small child. There was a miniseries on TV based on one of his books...IT.
My older brother and older cousins all watched it one Thanksgiving up in our playroom, while us younger kids were banned from the room. I remember my Mom saying it was too scary for me to watch...which if you know me at all, forbidding me from doing something or watching something is just going to make me all the more curious about it. The playroom at my parents house is upstairs and while the older kids watched the movie us younger kids kept sneaking up the stairs and peering through the cracked door to catch glimpses here and there of this "too scary movie". That movie was scary!!!!!! I don't think I even saw that much of it at the time but those images of that killer clown are burned forever in my memory! I remember my brother and cousinst talking about it the next day..."Oh of course it's scary it's a Stephen King"...whatever that meant to me at the time. This Stephen King must be scary, was the name of the clown Stephen King I remember wondering. I did end up seeing the whole movie sometime much later and it still scared the crap out of me. And I somewhere along the road figured out that Stephen King wrote books, scary books...but I didn't really enjoy reading until after High School...when I would be met with Stephen King yet again.



I was working at Sam's Club and I had been lucky enough to land the ideal cashier spot...the Tobacco Cage. Which is exactly how it sounds...it's like a big cage full of cigarettes and chewing tobacco. This was an ideal spot because it wasn't all that busy and you got to know the vendors really well and it was out of the way so no one really was keeping tabs on you. Anyways one day someone checked out at "the cage" and they decided against buying a book. Thus leaving the book with me as a go-back. Now what book could that be? It was Stephen King's "The Shining". I was so bored down there that I flipped the book over and read the back. I had not ever seen the Kubrick movie but knew it played often on AMC during the month of October. It seemed like something to pass the time so I started to read the book. Stephen King is really good at the hook. I mean even in the books that I have read that were not very good he is ALWAYS good at drawing you in at the start. This is something rather important in a book...otherwise why keep reading? Anyways I had read something like 80 pages by the time I went to my lunch break and I was hooked. I took the book home that night, do I admit that I didn't pay for it, whoops! Well I brought it back and didn't keep it, so it was more like borrowing than stealing...right? Whatever! That book is so damn scary you wouldn't believe me without reading it yourself. That book is what sparked in me a love of reading as an adult. That book, ohhhhh I can't even tell you is horrifying! I had never been drawn into reading the way I was when I read that book. Reading was always homework, always something to suffer through for a good grade's sake.



After reading "The Shining" I began to read and read and read. I love reading as an adult and it's thanks to good ole' Stephen. Anyone reading this blog who likes to be scared, who likes a good horror movie or story....you need to read "The Shining". There is an episode of Friends about this book. Where Rachel finds a copy of "The Shining" in Joey's freezer and he tells her that's where he puts the book when it gets too scary. It really is awesome and way better than the Kubrick movie.



Anyways I have read a number of his books and for some reason I like to keep most of the books I have read...but I feel somewhat embarassed to have the King books out in public in my house. Like someone would see Stephen King on my book shelf and completely write me off as a "real reader". Oh she just reads for the pure entertainment quality...she doesn't read things that make her think, or ponder or inspire. "Stephen King is only in it for the money...he wants to make money", they might think. "Here is Emily part of the sheep buying his books". This is stupid I realize...but I don't think anyone out there would doubt that this is a reality of judgement when it comes to what kinds of books you want people to know you read or have read. Stephen King isn't Faulkner or Bukowski or Capote or Steinbeck. But that is what I like about him...he never claimed to be. If being successful in life has anything to do with being really good at what you do...Stephen King is good at what he does. He is known to be a science fiction and horror writer. And his books will scare the bejeezus out of you. The man can tell a good ghost story.



So since it's Halloween time and I know I like a good scare; here are some good book by King to read if you can get part the book snob in yourself



The Shining

Salem's Lot

IT

Needful Things

Pet Sematary

The Stand

The Mist

Dreamcatcher


Happy Halloween!!!!!


Sunday, October 2, 2011

14 years of excellence

Okay maybe not excellence...but at least mediocrity. One accident, a few fix it tickets, nothing major. So I have to renew my drivers licence. I have officially been driving for 14 years. Actually my license expired on my birthday but I kinda forgot and then remembered like a week later but then really didn't do anything about it. And I have kinda been driving anyway even though I guess technically I am not allowed to drive, whatever!!!! But I guess this week is the week I HAVE TO go renew it or Mitchell will never shut up about how irresponsible I am. I was kinda worried that since I am like a month late they would make me take the written test again...which I would like to say I'd pass...but really I mean some of those questions...unless you were 15 and trying to get a permit you would not know the answers. But I called and all I have to do is pay the fee, do an eye exam and take a new picture. I am kinda happy about a new picture because I kinda hate my old one. I have the Rosemary's Baby hairdo in it and no one ever seems to believe it's me when cashing checks and what not.

This was my haircut, that was even how I described what I wanted to the hair stylist...I liked it for a while but when I was over it...it took a while for my hair to get the clue!!! Have you ever grown out a pixie cut? Urghhh it's like mullet status for a while there. Also I am not sure it ever looked as good on me as it did on Rosemary...or Mia Farrow.
This strangely enough was the day I took the picture for my drivers license. I guess I was testing out just how "butch" I was gonna look in this driver's license photo I would have for the unforeseeable future. You see I look pretty good here. However for some reason I was possessed to wear lipstick for my DL photo...and that, that....was not a good idea. I look crazy. I never wear lipstick...it must have been suggested by my mother to make up for my short hair...which she of course hated. Not to mention my hair looks like unnaturally yellow in the picture, oh well.

So I have to update my info as well. I'm not all that convinced I should update my weight...if I even knew what it was to begin with...I don't weigh myself for obvious reasons, have not since before Olivia was born. My license right now says I weigh 130, ha I wish...honestly I probably weighed more than that when I renewed it last...but I can't be sure. But since my license before that said 115 and that was actually a true weight at the time...awww that's depressing!

I guess what I am have thinking about the most is the hair color option. I have not been blonde in a long time. I don't know if I will be anytime soon. I would like to think I will be again someday, it just seems like such a process because it is so dark now...and I don't want to cut off a bunch of damage that will likely happen if I bleach it. So do I change the current "blonde" hair to "brown". It seems so sad...like saying goodbye to my fun self...because I think blondes really do have more fun. And I have had like every hair color so I think I am a fair judge.


Here I am on the right having significantly more fun in my life than I seem to have these days. Notice the otter pop in my hand, everyone knows how fun otter pops are...actually it's probably the Walmart knockoff "flavor ice"...whatever! See my roommate Jenn is also blonde and she is having more fun too...there we were just 2 blondes having fun!



And this thought just occurred to me...if I leave it saying blonde and I am standing in front of the disgruntled DMV Clerk will they make me switch it to brown...since it is currently brown.


This is confusing. Does this mean if I want to keep it saying blonde I have to wear a blonde wig or something....huhhhhh.



So I guess I am doomed to a significantly less fun future as a brunette.



No offence "brunies".



And I am still not going to put down my actual weight...they can't take away my inaccurate weight!!!!!