Wednesday, April 22, 2009

My timing must be off

*Warning if you are at all offended by the sight of poop you may want to skip this one
Ever since miss baby arrived I have seemed to struggle with the problem of timing. Managing time of course has become a challenge since my life now revolves around a rather unpredictable infant. I am told that her predictability will soon be established but there may be one thing I may never be able to time right.
Diaper changes and the poop and pee issue.
You see I seem to at least every other day struggle with an unexpected pee or poop in the middle of a diaper change. Thank heavens she is not a boy or I would regularly get shot with pee in my face.

I don't know if it's just my baby but she seems to have quite the trajectory with the poop.

Last night as I awoke bleary-eyed to her crying I arranged to change her, feed her and then pray that she go right back to sleep. Good plan...will it happen is the question. Well in my exhausted state I decided to just change her on the bed. I was too tired to fuss with the changing table.

I open the diaper and notice that she is only wet not poopy and think to myself that it's kinda odd but whatever easier clean-up. As I lift her by the ankles to replace the wet diaper with a new one I hear the dreaded sound. I can't even describe accurately what it sounds like but any other mother probably knows exactly the sound I mean. And before I have time to react it's everywhere. Poop!
All over the bed, all over her, on my pants, on my shirt and wait for it........ on my face and glasses...thank God I was wearing glasses!

I probably should have been more horrified but for some reason, most likely lethargy, I found it funny. I cleaned up and she went back to sleep. I was yet again amazed about how often something like this seems to happen to me.

Had I waited a little while the poop would have been where it belonged, the diaper. Alas what can I say.
As Forrest Gump would say "shit happens"....excuse the language of the expression.

Yesterday I was changing her, on the changing table, and as I lifted the dirty diaper away and wiped her sweet little cheeks clean I noticed how happy she was to be naked. She was squawking away and kicking her legs and flailing her little arms. I thought okay she can hang for a while since she was being irresistibly cute. I turn to throw the diaper away and then talk to her for a while about her busy baby day. She is cooing and smiling and then she falls silent and the sweet little noises are replaced by that crazy expolsion sound. POOP! All over her and all over the changing table...I should have known!


And to add insult to injury after her bath tonight she once again let it rip once snug and secure in her little baby towel. She was laying on my bed in her towel but this time I for once had the foresight to lay down a thick adult towel underneath her.


But she did manage to fall peacefully asleep afterwards. I guess as a mother you have to chose your battles. I would much prefer poop than a crying, refuses to sleep baby.




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